The River’s Bend Sessions

None of this is real

None of this is happening

Nothing has to stop

Nothing ever could

Nothing would be good

I was never born

I’ll never be forgotten

I was never here

You never had to see

What’s become of me

Dust and gas in outer space

Clouds collapsing into stars

That flare then fade then get replaced

It’s nothing like a fall from grace

Nothing like a fall from grace

I never made you hurt

I never made you love

You were always safe

I never told a lie

You never caught my eye

Dust and gas in outer space

Clouds collapsing into stars

That flare then fade then get replaced

It’s nothing like a fall from grace

Nothing like a fall from grace

Dust and gas in outer space

Clouds collapsing into stars

That flare then fade then get replaced

It’s nothing like a fall from grace

Nothing like a fall from grace

I’ve been crying in my sleep

I wake up tangled in the sheets

I been thinking ‘bout all I’ve done wrong

I’m trying to learn a different song

Now the poison’s left my veins

But I’m still waiting for a change

By all rights I should have wound up dead

I wonder what I’ll do instead

I think I’ll find a new girl

Soft and sweet a brand new girl

A willing open kind of girl

I think I need a new girl

We’re all hungry when we’re born

We’re all trying to get warm

But there are some who don’t get fed

At least that’s what my mama said

I know just the girl to try

And I’ll even tell you why

You’ve got no hurting to forget

You ain’t been ruined by me yet

I think I found a new girl

Don’t want a tested, tired girl

A wary and been-through-it girl

I think I need a new girl

Baby leave me here with my last cigarette

You don’t want to be the only vice I got left

Go on and leave me here with my last cigarette

You don’t want to be here

I’m a dog who’s lost a bone

I’m a man without a home

I got people who are bound to me

I’ll hurt them ‘til they set me free

And then I’ll have my new girl

Soft and sweet, that’s you girl

A willing open kind of girl

All I need’s a new girl

I could love a new girl

Treat her right, my new girl

A willing open kind of girl

All I need’s a new girl

They say I was a golden child

I never cried, I only smiled

Can’t think of when I’ve told a lie

Don’t even get a little high

I go to church, sing in the choir

I act like a saint, make me a liar

All I been doing is biding my time

Keeping an eye out for the perfect crime

It’s easy to be good it’s easy to do right

When you got no one to keep you awake all night

I’m tired of good, I’m sick of nice

I’m ready for a taste of vice

I’m working hard, I’m pitching in

Now you help me, teach me to sin

I’m real polite, been raised up well

I don’t want heaven, take me to hell

All I been doing is biding my time

Keeping an eye out for the perfect crime

It’s easy to be good it’s easy to do right

When you got no one to keep you awake all night

You lack restraint, you are a cheat

You find someone new and then repeat

That’s what they say, can’t disagree

Oh, I don’t care, let it be me

Yeah you’re all wrong, but you should know

That’s what I like, don’t take it slow

All I been doing is biding my time

Keeping an eye out for the perfect crime

It’s easy to be good it’s easy to do right

When you got no one to keep you awake all night

I’ve been living in a good world

Moving through it like a good girl

Wondering ‘bout the first bad thing I’d do

Now I know it’s you

You make me want, it makes me cruel

I’ll let you in but I’m no fool

I’m stronger than they think I am

I won’t get wrecked by you, old man

All I been doing is biding my time

Keeping an eye out for the perfect crime

It’s easy to be good it’s easy to do right

When you got no one to keep you awake all night

I’ve been living in a good world

Moving through it like a good girl

You should have known better

I wore no disguise

I’m a wolf in wolf’s clothing

A snake that won’t hide

They should have known better

Than to open the gate

To offer me shelter

To think you’d be safe

We went down to the river

And the water was deep

It was there I discovered

The secrets you’d keep

There’s no gentle parting

And no farewell kiss

There’s only a current

too strong to resist

Oh

This kingdom’s your birthright

This land is your home

I thought I could conquer

Could make it my own

I should have known better

Than to look in your eyes

Than to fall for your laughter

Your sweet little lies

You are a sleeper,

An innocent spy

With power and beauty

I could not deny

You are a vision,

A treasure, a thief

You steal the snake’s venom

Turn wolves into sheep

Oh

Darling please tell me

Somewhere we can go

Where we can find lightness

You’ll sing soft and low

In the river you’ll wash

All the dirt from my face

But I should know better

There is no such place

Arranged on the table

Or down on the floor

Whatever you offer

I’ll always take more

A feast at the table

Or crumbs from the floor

Whatever I offer

You’ll always take more

Oh

This isn’t over ‘til we’re both used up

No matter what we have it’s never enough

You know what I like and you’re happy to give it

If you took it away you know I’d barely miss it

That’s no way to live, I can hear someone say

You can’t win the game if you don’t even play

I played once, I played hard, I gave up all control

What I lost in the end was most of my soul

And the fragment that’s left I’ve encased in hard plastic

It’s locked and alarmed, which I know is quite drastic

Just leave it alone, it will all turn out fine

I’m not yours, you’re not mine, we’re just spending some time

What I love about you is you’re always around

What I love about you is you can’t let me down

Love is a sickness, I’ve had all the symptoms

Increasing heart rate and narrowing vision

A need to crawl inside of the lover’s skin

A feeling that life is about to begin

But with you I feel well, there’s no shortness of breath

I like how you touch me, I like how you laugh

I have to leave now, you’ll probably stay here

But maybe I’ll see you sometime next year

If you’re gone it’s okay, I’ll find someone new

Though no one’s as easy to be with as you

What I love about you is you’re always around

What I love about you is you can’t let me down

What I love about you is you’re always around

What I love about you is you can’t let me down

I brought you to this place

Looked into my own face

I brought you to this place

And looked into my own face

No one else ever broke my heart

I could have held your hand

Helped you become a man

I could have held your hand

Helped you become a man

But I never had the guts to start

I don’t want to be what I am

Don’t want you to be what I am

What if this is it?

You were my greatest hit

What if this is it

And you were my greatest hit

But I couldn’t hear you through the crowd

I dreamed you before you were

I dreamed you would be like her

I dreamed you before you were

I dreamed you would be like her

I dreamed that one day I’d make you proud

I don’t want to be what I am

Don’t want you to be what I am

Maybe we start again

Maybe we could pretend

Maybe we start again

Maybe you could pretend

We both know I’d throw it all away

Some days the sun shines bright

Other days feel like night

Some days the sun shines bright

Other days feel like night

I don’t think the light will come today

I don’t want to be what I am

Don’t want you to be what I am

Have courage, have courage

Have courage, have courage

Have courage, have courage

Take a breath and count to three

And maybe you will see the way you look

When you are looking right through me

And if you count to four

Maybe you’ll see more than just the man you find so easy to ignore

You never knew me at all, it’s just as well

I can pretend I never fell in love with you

I was just wishing, hoping, and planning

I was just wasting all my time

You didn’t notice, you didn’t know me at all

Close your eyes and count to five

And maybe you’ll arrive at the conclusion that we both tend to deny

I count backwards in my mind

As if I could rewind and take back all the years I tried to make you mine

You never knew me at all, I see it now

You didn’t care about the things I liked to do

I was agreeing, I wasn’t thinking

I was just running after you

You didn’t slow down, you didn’t know me at all

Some days I wonder what went wrong

But not for long

You never knew me at all, I’m such a fool

I can’t pretend I never fell in love with you

But I can leave now, and I can tell you

All of the ways you let me down

Cause you never noticed, you’ll never know me at all

Gave the first one what he wanted so he took me for a whore

I tried to make it better but by then I was a bore

I can’t do it, I can’t do this any more

You can bet I learned my lesson and I used my expertise

I held out on the next one and he said I was a tease

I can’t do this, I can’t find a way to please

Can’t let another man, can’t let another man

Can’t let another man call me baby again

I grew older, I stopped tryin' to make em fall in love

They all love to call me baby and I act like it’s enough

But I can’t do it, I can’t make my heart that tough

Can’t let another man, can’t let another man

Can’t let another man call me baby again

Now you tell me that you like me, you tell me you’ll be true

I should make some calculations fore I do those things I do

I can’t do it, I can’t play those games with you

Now before I launch back into that tired old refrain

You’ll have to make a promise that you’ll call me by my name

And then I’ll do it, hope it don’t turn out the same

Can’t let another man, can’t let another man

Can’t let another man call me baby again

Can’t let another man, can’t let another man

Can’t let another man call me baby again, understand